It’s not always easy to learn how to love someone deeply, but it’s definitely worth the effort. When we truly love someone, we want to give them our best.
We open up our hearts and share our fears and vulnerabilities with them. We tell them stories about past relationships and the cell phone cheating signs we’ve seen in other people. We show them our deepest, most intimate selves and hope that they will do the same.
Unfortunately, sometimes our best isn’t good enough, and the person we love suffers because of it. If you’re struggling to love someone deeply, here’s a guide that can help.
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How to Love Someone More Without Expectations & Get What We Need from Our Relationships
We all want to be loved. It’s a fundamental human need, and we will go to great lengths to find it. We’ll try every dating app, read every self-help book, and see every therapist in town.
But what if the answer isn’t out there? What if the answer is different from common advice on how to love someone more?
What if the answer is to love without expectations?
When we love someone, we want them to meet our needs. We want them to be our partner, lover, and best friend. We want them to be everything we need and more.
This is called conditional love, and it’s the most common type of love there is. It’s also the least effective.
Conditional love is based on what we can get from the other person. It’s a trade-off – I’ll meet your needs if you meet mine. But this only works if both people are able and willing to meet each other’s needs. And even then, it’s not guaranteed.
The problem with conditional love is that it’s rooted in selfishness. We’re not really interested in the other person, we’re only interested in what they can do for us. Sooner or later, this always leads to disappointment.
How to be more loving in a relationship? The answer is to love without expectations. To love unconditionally. To become twin flames like here.
This doesn’t mean we stop caring about our own needs. But it does mean that we don’t expect the other person to meet them. We don’t make them responsible for our happiness.
Instead, we focus on giving love, without any thought of what we might get in return. We give because we want to, not because we expect something from the other person.
Unconditional love is true selflessness. It’s completely focused on the other person and their happiness.
Of course, this isn’t always easy. We’re human, after all. We have our own needs and desires. But if we can learn to love unconditionally, it will transform our relationships in ways we never thought possible.
Here are some tips on how to love unconditionally:
1. Forgive easily
When someone we love hurts us, it’s natural to want revenge. We want to make them feel the pain they’ve caused us. But this only creates more pain for everyone involved.
Instead, love your partner and try to forgive quickly. Don’t hold onto the anger and resentment. It will only hurt you in the end.
2. Be honest about your feelings
We all have feelings that we’re afraid to show. We’re afraid of rejection or judgement. But if we want to love unconditionally, we need to be honest about our emotions.
It’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s okay to show your partner that you’re hurt or scared. They need to know how you feel to truly understand you. And who know, maybe you’ll put beautiful rings on each other’s fingers one day. You can read more about them later.
3. Don’t expect anything in return
One of the most difficult things about love is learning to accept that we can’t control how someone else feels about us. We can’t make them love us back the way we want them to. And that’s okay.
What’s important is that we focus on giving love, not on receiving it. When we do that, we open up the possibility for true intimacy and connection.
4. Communicate openly and honestly
Communication is key in any relationship, but it’s especially important in a romantic one. How to love your partner better? We need to be able to express our needs and desires, and we need to be able to listen to our partner’s as well.
If you’re not used to communicating openly, it can be difficult to start. But it’s so important for the health of your relationship. Try to practice every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Listen to your partner, and really try to understand what they’re saying. And when you’re speaking, be honest and authentic.
5. Be patient
Love takes time. It doesn’t happen overnight. And that’s okay. If we’re patient, we’ll be able to weather the ups and downs of a relationship and come out stronger in the end.
Of course, being patient doesn’t mean being a doormat. If you’re not getting your needs met, it’s okay to speak up. Just remember to do it in a way that’s respectful and considerate of your partner.
6. Be present
In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in our own lives and forget how to love your partner. But if we want to love them deeply, we need to be present with them. That means putting away our phones, turning off the TV, and listening when they talk to us.
It can be challenging to be present all the time, but it’s worth it when we see the smile on our loved one’s face. Emotional involvement is the key to deep, lasting love.
7. Show your love in action
Words are important, but actions speak louder. You can click to see the best presents for your beloved person. Or if you want to show your partner how much you love them, cook them dinner, do something special for them, or simply give them a hug when they need it.
The little things matter just as much as the big things, so don’t forget to show your love in both big and small ways. Your attention to details can go a long way in making your partner feel loved.
8. Be supportive
We all have bad days, and sometimes we need a shoulder to cry on. That’s where our loved ones come in. How to be more loving to my boyfriend or girlfriend? When they’re going through a tough time, be there for them. Listen to them, offer sage advice if you have any, and be a supportive presence.
Sometimes, all our loved ones need is someone to lean on. Be that person for them, and let them know that you’re always there for them, no matter what.
9. Don’t take them for granted
It’s easy to get complacent in a relationship and start taking our loved ones for granted. We assume they’ll always be there, so we stop doing the things that make them feel loved. But this is a mistake.
If we want our relationships to thrive, we need to keep doing the things that make our partners feel special. Otherwise, they’ll start to feel taken for granted, and that’s when resentment starts to set in.
10. Make time for them
In our busy lives, it’s easy to let our relationships fall by the wayside. We get so caught up in work, or taking care of our families, that we forget to make time for the people we love despite there are so many ways to do it.
But if we want our relationships to last, we need to make time for our partners.
For example, this article has 7 ways to celebrate your romantic events.
How to be more loving in a relationship? This means scheduling regular date nights, or just making sure we have some quality time together every day.
11. Be their biggest cheerleader
No one knows our loved ones better than we do. So it’s up to us to be their biggest fans and cheer them on through thick and thin. When they’re feeling down, be there to lift them up. When they’re celebrating a victory, be there to celebrate with them.
Our emotional connection with our loved ones is one of the most important things in our lives. And by being their biggest cheerleader, we can help them – and ourselves – stay connected and happy.
12. Never stop trying
When we love someone, we need to show them every day. Whether it’s cooking their favorite meal, buying them a thoughtful gift, or just sending a sweet text, these little gestures let our loved ones know that we’re thinking of them.
While it’s important to never stop trying, we also need to accept that sometimes our best just isn’t good enough. Some days, no matter how hard we try, we just can’t make the person we love happy. And that’s OK.
Conclusion
When we learn how to love someone deeply, we want to give them our best. Unfortunately, sometimes our best isn’t good enough, and the person we love suffers because of it. If you’re struggling to love someone deeply, here’s a guide that can help.
Deep love requires understanding and communication. It’s important to be able to understand your partner’s needs and wants, and to be able to communicate your own. Without these things, it’s difficult to maintain a deep, lasting connection.
It’s also important to be supportive and patient. Love isn’t always easy, and sometimes it requires sacrifice. But if you’re willing to put in the work, it can be one of the most rewarding experiences you’ll ever have. Thanks for reading.
